Here’s how to save a relationship, but first a little story. Sean works late hours and Lizzy doesn’t feel like he has time for her. She spends most of her time taking care of the children and Sean doesn’t feel like she’s got time for him. Can their relationship be saved? Should it be saved?
Before a relationship can be saved, you have to decide if it’s worth saving. Most can be saved if both parties involved decide to put in the hard work sometimes required. If, however, one of the people involved isn’t dedicated to saving it, there isn’t much you can do.
The biggest challenge faced with how to save a relationship is that both people have to come to the decision that the relationship is actually worth saving. There are plenty of people driving by you every day that stay in “convenient” relationships or end up in marriages for the kids, and this just isn’t enough. You both have to be dedicated and certain it’s worth saving.
One problem with how to save a relationship is that people falsely believe that the symptoms of the problems are the problems themselves. That’s why the next step you need to take is to zone in on the problem or problems in the relationship.
Many people see an affair as a problem. After all, affairs cause many break ups, but in truth, the affair is usually a symptom of a deeper problem. Often this is lack of real intimacy. Most likely we see this situation and assume the affair is the problem, but it’s just the symptom. What’s worse, if the real problem isn’t dealt with, the symptoms could continue. While you may be able to stop another affair with guilt, other problems, like pornography addiction, may arise because the core issue hasn’t been handled.
When you start to handle the real core of the issue, and not the symptoms, you are able to save the relationship.
After you have identified the true problems, you are able to verbalize your feelings and share your thoughts while allowing your partner to do the same. Listen to their concerns, and hold your partner’s hand while listening to them. This will show them that you want to reconnect even when you are emotionally swirling. When your partner mentions something that hurts you, remember that they aren’t usually doing it out of spite, but because they want to save the relationship.
If your biggest problem is that you don’t spend time together like you used to, schedule a weekend getaway or set up a weekly date night, even if it’s Wednesday. The two of you can take turns thinking of different fun ways to spend the evening together.
If communication is your issue, schedule 20 minutes before bed when you turn off the TV, shut down the computer and silence your phone and just talk, just the two of you. And, then take action and do it.
The last thing to do is realize that saving a relationship is very often a long process. You will experience joy and pain along the way as you take two steps forward and one step back. Just be slow to place blame and always be fast to apologize.
Is the relationship your struggling with worth saving? I hope it is, and if you think so, follow the advice given in this article and be committed to it.
Want to find out more about How To Save Your Relationship, then visit Paul ‘PJ’ Jackson’s site and discover if you can Save Your Relationship or if it is doomed.
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Mike is working constantly and Debra thinks he’s not spending a sufficient amount of time around the family. Most of Debra’s time is spent taking care of their 3 kids and Mike feels like Debra is not devoting enough attention to him. Can Mike and Debra save their relationship? Should they save their relationship. Here are some helpful tips on how to save a relationship.
Your first step is to make a decision as to whether or not it is worth it to save your relationship. Almost all relationships can be saved if you work at it, but it requires both parties to make that commitment. If one of you is not willing to try, then the other person does not have a lot of options.
Many people stay in a failed relationship because it is convenient or because they want the kids to have both parents with them. Of course, the kids’ best interest is always a very important consideration, but it is not likely to be enough by itself. How to save a relationship starts with a strong commitment from both people involved that are willing to do all they can to save it.
The next thing that needs to be done is to figure out what the real problems are inside the relationship. Many people go wrong with trying to learn how to save a relationship because they have the mistaken belief that a symptom of a problem is the actual problem itself.
An example of this is a couple that is no longer truly intimate together. To fill that void, one or both may seek to get the need for intimacy met by someone else. Now, this behavior is just a symptom, and will most likely continue unless the underlying problem of no true intimacy in the relationship is dealt with.
After you have diagnosed the core issues, you can begin to share your thoughts and feelings. By this I mean both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to the concerns of your partner.
After identifying in great detail the main problems that are tearing the relationship apart, work together on a plan to get these problems resolved. Once that’s done, act immediately toward implementing your plan.
An example of this would be if you both decide that one of your core issues is not seeing each other very often. If this is the case, then come up with a plan to go out together one night a week and do something special and memorable to rekindle the relationship. Then, make sure to actually DO this every week without fail.
The last point to remember is that how to save a relationship is never a completed work. ALL relationships have their issues, even among couples who’ve been together for fifty years or more. The key is to always approach your partner with an attitude of love and forgiveness. This kind of attitude will give you a far better chance of a lasting relationship.
Find out additional info about how to save a relationship and eliminate the frustration of your painful breakup once and for all at www.RestoreMyRelationship.com
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