How To Make a Relationship Last
When you become successful with women, there is going to come a time when a special girl comes along that you would like to keep. For many men, that’s the end game – the reason why we’re doing this in the first place – not so that they can sleep with a new hottie every day, but so they will be able to find a girl that has something which makes her unique and well suited for them in particular.
With that, you need to know, as detailed as possible, what you are looking for in regards to this keeper. That way you can spot them.
Typically, this doesn’t have anything to do with physical traits. Usually, you’re already interested in her because you’re physically attracted. The “Keeper” qualities are typically perosnality traits that you find appealing.
Things like – is she funny? Smart? Does she make you feel good? Are the two of you sexually compatible? Do you share the same beliefs and goals?
When you know exactly what you’re looking for in an ideal mate, you’ll be able to spot her when she comes along, so you’re going to want to have some type of list that let’s you know what you’re looking for.
When you find a girl that you especially like, close to your ideal (very rarely, if ever, will you find a girl that meets ALL of your criteria), you should play a slightly different game than when you are when you’re just trying to get a girl into bed.
If you sleep with this girl immediately, she is going to suspect that you are looking more for adventure and excitement than for stability, trust, and a longer relationship.
And for some people, establishing a relationship after a one night-stand can be very hard. Why is this? Because if you slept together the first night you met, even if you do get into some kind of relationship, as soon as she goes out with her friends or you go out with your friends, the issue of trust is going to rear its ugly head.
How can she trust that you are not going to cheat on her? How can you trust her that she won’t cheat on you? So trust is going to be very difficult to establish fully, and trust is a crucial thing in long term relationships!
Here’s some advice in regards to this: don’t try to sleep with her on the first night that you’ve met her. Kiss her, take her phone number, improve your rapport, and then plan on meeting her another time.
You can build a relationship from a one night stand though. You need to make sure that you aren’t too aggressive. A low key, attentive approach is far better. Make love to her; not just wild sex.
Cuddle her more, hold eye contact longer while having sex and also try to give her lots of orgasms. Let her gain immense pleasure from being with you. That will be some kind of guarantee that she will come back for more, and also subcommunicate that you like her, and that you care about her and how she feels.
Another thing to be aware of if you’re taking it slow – do not engage in straight intercourse the first time you’re with her. Instead, focus on other aspects of lovemaking, like foreplay, heavy petting, and other techniques. Holding off on the full-on act of sex will show her that you’re different from the others, and you want it to be something special.
When it comes to long term, healthy relationships, sex is the first thing that must be mastered. Having a healthy sex life will make the relationship a strong one.
After that comes the harder aspects – trust, comfort, and communication.
It’s important that you trust and feel comfortable around your partner. In fact, these two things usually go hand-in-hand. The more you trust someone, the more comfortable you are around them, and vice versa.
Trust comes from being honest with your partner, and comfort comes from demonstrating understanding and compassion.
But no ammount of sex, trust, or comfort is going to happen without communication. This is the most important factor in keeping a girl for the long term.
Good communication is critical, because communication is what creates intimacy between two people. Being able to share one’s hopes, dreams, fears, insecurities, bad days, and good days – this all goes towards creating strong bonds that last a lifetime.
When it comes to communication, remember one thing: it’s about both of you. Not just your emotions, desires, and thoughts. It’s about hers too, and if you neglect her, you’ll find the emotional connection you’ve built will undoubtably fade. If she strays after that, I wouldn’t be surprised.
Be conscious of what she is trying to communicate to you. Try to be open to it. If you can, keeping her should be much easier.
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